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"Who is your best friend ?" I looked thru my phone list today....looking for someone that i can called upon. Someone who I can for sure say he/she would be there when I send the SOS, someone who I would be comfortable enough to waste his/her time to listen to my trivial proble. I could not find anyone who I won't feel guilty for bothering his/her time with. I made a last call to someone but was turned down. (Germ, I am not talking about you so stop cooking urself in the pot of guilt.)

All this while, I live in a world of my own. My own set of rules, my own set of beliefs and a huge sense of aloofness.
All this while, I always felt that He is having a great time playing a fool with my life but maybe its just signs that I chose to ignore and refuse to believe.

But now...maybe its time that I force myself to believe that things turn out the way it is...not because He was having a jolly good time making merry with my life, it happen because someone just couldn't care for more.


I started this blog and the one before for a reason and I guess recently I lost this reason. When I thought things would finally turn out fine..it turns out to be the exact opposite. Its time to say Good Bye and its has been a pleasure and honor. Thanks guys.

Traffic Jam

Anyone who knows me well enough will know or probably can imagine how I would react when I am in a traffic jam. Anyone who needs a refresher course on the "colorful" languages of Singapore can just find me when I am stuck in a traffic jam and he/she will find it deeply enriching.

Just 2 days ago, I went for quite an enjoyable dinner at Timbre after a long day at work. Took a cab home and guess what, I got stuck in a traffic jam. Before you guys smirk and say "there he goes again", guess what...for that 20 odd minutes in the cab, stuck amidst the wave of weary home-goers, for the first time in my life...I felt free. Freed from all worries, free from the constant need to blitz from pt A to pt B, liberated from all onus of life, released from all conflicts and unbound from the heavy chains of weariness. I felt light...(the only reason why I did not float out of my seat was probably my ass was too heavy.) I finally found my haven,I was finally at peace with myself and everything else, it all didn't seem to matter anymore. It was the traffic jam that I never wanted to end. It was a world that I din wanna leave, it was a feeling that I was willing to give up everything for,everything, just for a while more....

As we all know, nothing good last, I did get home, awakening back to the world that I know so well. All i could say now is even if it does not come back to me again...I would say just that 20 odd mins was the best time I ever had.

Exhausted

Have anyone of you ever felt so tired that you just decided that you don't give a shit for anything anymore and just stopped whatever you are doing ?

I did it today, closed my eyes, took a deep breath, the brain gave a sign of relief and....I guess I still have some time left.